In a statement posted on its Wordpress blog this week, the MPAA announced that it will respond to the Internet's "destructive" effect on creative works with a new PSA, to be funded on the crowd-funding platform Kickstarter. "Rampant content theft -- or as we call it, creativity murder -- makes it impossible to promote ideas online," according to a Tweet from MPAA chairman Chris Dodd. "For a pledge of $50, backers will receive an exclusive DVD copy of 'Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked' in 3D."
Privacy advocates are calling foul on a new partnership between Google and the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) that would index the backscatter x-ray images taken at airline security checkpoints. "This will help singles get a first look even before the first date," said a Google spokesman. "Google Nude View," as the program is called, represents the first major initiative for the company since it changed its venerable slogan from "Don't Be Evil" to "Mwahahaha!"
RIAA chairman Cary Sherman has announced a new agreement between his organization and some of the largest American ISPs that would require subscribers accused of infringement to compete in a televised gladitorial battle to the death. Sherman responded this week to concerns about the severity of the program saying, "Obviously we don't think that all of the infringers selected as tributes should meet their death in the arena. Presumably one of them makes it out alive."
The US Patent and Trademark Office has been forced to halt the issuing of new patents after being sued for violation of patent number #4608919, "System and Method For Granting Limited Monopolies On Inventions."
In a misguided attempt to stifle anonymous speech while "preserving the culture" of the service, the popular social site Reddit recently announced it would institute a "real names only" policy that only allows user to select the name Chuck Norris. While we applaud their ingenuity in avoiding the pitfalls other sites have encountered in determining what does or doesn't look like a "real" name, we remain concerned over the closure of another venue for pseudonymous speech.
The leaked draft of the Trans-Pacific Partnership has not been confirmed by the negotiating parties, but a highly-placed source claims to have overheard the US Trade Representative saying, "Who wouldn't want to snuggle with a puppy while watching their pirated copy of Season 1 Game of Thrones?"
A new whitepaper on mobile privacy, co-authored by Technology Projects Director Peter Eckersley and Activism Director Rainey Reitman, is one of the most concise yet published by EFF. Titled "Protecting Your Privacy in the Mobile Era," the report consists entirely of the five words "Don't use a mobile phone." This complements EFF's 1991 report: "Don't use electronic mail."
In an alarming trend, job seekers are increasingly reporting that prospective employers are requiring Farmville passwords or "neighbor" requests from prospective employees. One job seeker, speaking on the condition of anonymity, expressed serious privacy concerns about the trend: "My virtual crops and livestock are sensitive information, and none of my boss' business. I think he's just looking for somebody to harvest his tomatoes."
EFF calls on karaoke machine vendors to "know their customer" when selling equipment to governments and the very drunk. While karaoke is "dual use" technology and may be used for legitimate purposes, EFF condemns its use by oppressive over-singers, divas, and Journey fans.
Security researchers at the McMurdo research station in Antarctica have published alarming results about insufficient randomness in the generation of new snowflakes. As many as 2 in every 1000 snowflakes is reported to be neither beautiful nor unique.
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EFF-ers mourn the loss of beloved intern Dewey Cheatum, mistaken for a chew toy by resident Newfoundland and Canine Outreach Coordinator Kodi in a lunchtime incident gone horribly wrong. "I keep warning people, he's fast. He can eat a ham sandwich well before a grand jury even thinks of indicting it," said EFF's Legal Director and guardian ad litem for Kodi. Kodi could not be reached for comment, as he was sleeping off his meal.
In order to complement our work in making the Internet more secure, today EFF is releasing a new Firefox extension designed to make the Internet more polite. By forcing the user to send the
HaTTiP header to friendly sites, a similarly pleasant header will be returned by the server. "We hope this leads to an uptick in the adoption of civility," says Senior Staff Technologist Seth Schoen.
We've heard from our members: there aren't enough hours in the day to proudly sport your EFF t-shirts, hats, pins, and other swag. That's why we're announcing "Wear Your EFF Swag to Bed Night". For one night only, cover yourself in stickers, wrap yourself in t-shirts, and please be careful with the pins. Sweet dreams!