A Publication of the Electronic Frontier Foundation ISSN 1062-9424
For the April Fool's Day issue of EFFector, see below; for the real ones, see http://eff.org/effector/.
Alpharetta, GA - Diebold Election Systems and Choicepoint, Inc., today announced a joint venture that could revolutionize the voting market. The concept is simple: combine Diebold's demonstrated expertise in voting systems with Choicepoint's superior data-mining techniques to produce PredictaVote(TM) - the first 100 percent voter-free, predictive voting system.
"The beauty of this approach is that it is self-correcting," explained Choicepoint CEO Derrick Sithe. "If someone wants to increase the chances that his or her vote will be counted correctly, the voter simply needs to open up more of his or her life to our data-collection methods. Apply for more credit cards. Register for more grocery loyalty cards. Purchase more subscriptions. Fill out more warranty cards. Compare that to today's paperless e-voting machines, where voters have no way to determine whether votes are accurately counted. There's really no comparison."
Even more impressive than its accuracy is its cost- effectiveness, say company spokespersons. PredictaVote caps a decade of innovation and strategic thinking at Diebold, explained Diebold President and CEO Ollie O'Sell. "Elections have historically been ridiculously expensive undertakings. Who's to blame? Quite simply: the voter. Accounting for everything from allowing employees time off to vote to ensuring the accuracy and security of the machines, elections drain an average of $12 billion from the American economy every year in the form of manufacturing costs and lost productivity. With PredictaVote, all of these problems go away with the voter."
Company officials conceded that a number of design choices had yet to be finalized, but emphasized that all predictive factors were customizable on a jurisdiction-by- jurisdiction and demographic-by-demographic basis. Immigrants and the homeless, for example - i.e., those without extensive credit histories - will be excluded from final vote tallies or be subject to additional invasive investigatory procedures, said Choicepoint's Sithe.
"This approach seems to be working well for us in our airport screening algorithms, and we see no reason that it wouldn't work here."
AP article:
http://www.eff.org/cgi/tiny?urlID=441
San Francisco, CA - The Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals today intervened in a controversial case to resolve the pressing issue of who is entitled to reporter's shield laws and the reporter's privilege under the federal First Amendment. In Apple Computer v. Zebest, the Court determined that the Internet service provider (ISP) for blogger Max R. Zebest cannot be forced to divulge the names of Zebest's confidential sources for a series of articles about forthcoming Apple products.
"Historically, the relevant question is whether the author had the intent to use the material - sought, gathered or received - to disseminate information to the public and whether such intent existed at the inception of the newsgathering process," wrote Judge Stephen S. Trott in the opinion. "But in an era when anyone with a computer and Internet connection can publish to the world, the key distinguishing factor is whether the author was wearing pants."
The Court looked to the example of blogger/journalist Jeff Gannon, explaining, "When Mr. Gannon was lobbing softball questions to the President on behalf of Talon News, he was acting just like any other member of the White House press corps — and, critically, he was wearing pants. In Mr. Gannon's other Internet publishing endeavors, however, he did not wear pants, and his activities therefore fall outside the boundaries of journalism."
The Court remanded the case for a determination of Mr. Zebest's attire while carrying out research, writing, and posting of articles revealing that the next generation of Macintosh computers would be named "G6." Zebest's attorney, EFF Staff Attorney Kurt Opshal, expressed optimism for his client's chances on remand. "As the record will clearly show, pajama pants are simply one of many variations on the pant theme."
For this release:
http://www.eff.org/cgi/tiny?urlID=441
Washington, DC - The Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA) this week announced that its litigation campaign against American filesharers will now end. Explained RIAA President Cory Shoreman, "In short, we sued 'em all. All 70 million, plus their parents, grandmothers, and roommates, have been properly brought to heel, for settlements ranging from between $3,000 and their entire net worth."
Shoreman continued, "The only logical result is that a properly chastened nation will now herd - peacefully, without protest - into the local malls to purchase from dusty, bulging shelves a dozen copies each of $18 Ashley Simpson copy-protected CDs."
"Why a dozen? Why, one CD for every RIAA-designed, government-approved listening device, of course! And then on top of that you've got to buy duplicates for back-ups in case any of them get scratched."
Twirling his moustachios and straightening his top hat, Shoreman chortled, "And they said the recording industry would never adjust to the Internet era!"
For this release:
http://www.eff.org/cgi/tiny?urlID=441
Washington, DC - Reacting to concerns from the music and movie industries that many consumers do not purchase CDs or attend movies when they've heard negative reviews in advance, the Federal Communications Commission (FCC) has issued a Notice of Proposed Rule Making (NPRM) regarding the "Narrowcast Flag." The flag, to be inserted into unencrypted spoken audio, would have to be recognized and implemented by specialized hearing-blocking devices to be implanted in every human ear. "Unauthorized negative reviews have had a devastating effect on the profitability of media," said Motion Picture Association of America (MPAA) spokesman B.G. Mogul. "Just think about 'Troy' or 'Battleship Earth.'"
Under the proposed rule, flag-recognition devices would be implanted in newborns at birth. These devices would create an annoying but non-lethal buzzing sound when they recognized that a consumer was attempting to hear a description or review that a studio owner had marked as "do not redistribute." The FCC says it recognizes the legacy problem that many currently existing consumers will not yet have the blocking device, but says many can be induced to "upgrade" by the promise of free movie tickets and CDs. Further, says the MPAA's Mogul, "those consumers will soon have aged out of our prime target audience."
Public interest groups EFF, Public Knowledge, and the American Library Association are already planning to challenge FCC's jurisdiction. "We thought it was bad when they claimed the right to regulate washing machines, but this is plainly absurd," said EFF's mascot, Peppercorn the Chinchilla.
For this release:
http://www.eff.org/cgi/tiny?urlID=441
Newport, CA - Acacia Research Corporation announced today that it has filed a new round of patent infringement lawsuits against users of online technology. The suits focus on a newly acquired Acacia patent entitled "A method for extracting financial payment from unaware victims by lying in wait," more commonly known as "being a troll." Specifically, the suits target the users of Blizzard Entertainment's popular "World of Warcraft" Massive Multiplayer Online Role-Playing Game who have chosen to play members of the Troll race.
"Acacia has invested heavily in researching and developing modern troll techniques. We cannot allow these lawless rapscallions to steal our patented methods and other valuable intellectual property," said Acacia CTO Ima Gonnaclubya. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go hide under a bridge."
In response, Blizzard has filed a countersuit against Acacia based on violations of its "click-through" website agreements. "If you read the 0.6 point type of Section XXIV.A.9.f(1)(iii) of the agreement, you can clearly see that by using your lungs to breathe while surfing the Internet, you agree that we r00l!!1," gloated Leet Hax0r, Blizzard Legal Overlord. "That means you're not even *allowed* to sue us - or any of our customers, either! LOLROTFLMAO!!"
CNET article:
http://www.eff.org/cgi/tiny?urlID=441
San Francisco - EFF co-founder and board member John Gilmore today announced that he will no longer use GNU/Linux machines, and that, henceforth, he will purchase only Microsoft software and will neither support nor be involved with any organization that does not adopt and immediately implement a plan to convert to Windows-only systems.
"I've given a great deal of thought to the concept of 'trusted computing,' and I have come to realize that computers are far too powerful tools to allow their unfettered use," said Gilmore. "There must be a trusted, centralized authority to closely monitor and gently-yet-firmly control what people do with their own computers. Otherwise, mere anarchy reigns."
Reaching down to straighten the laces of his shiny, black square-tip oxford shoes, Gilmore added, "Besides, you can't fight City Hall, and in the world of personal computing and the Internet - c'mon, guys, let's face it - Redmond is City Hall."
Gilmore spoke from San Francisco International Airport, where he submitted to a full-body search, provided complete documentation of his financial and medical records, and gave blood samples for a new national DNA database before being issued a requested "Trusted Traveler" ID card.
For this release:
http://www.eff.org/cgi/tiny?urlID=441
What DRM Is Good For
Preventing space aliens from getting Earth secrets
without paying:
http://www.chessbase.com/newsdetail.asp?newsid=2268
Major Labels Give Artists Health Insurance
RIAA member-companies also promised matching contributions
to their musicians' 401(k) plans:
http://www.eff.org/cgi/tiny?urlID=441
New Passport to Shout Personal Info at Passersby
The new "audible RFID" technology will make the documents
much easier to read by immigration officials and that
dude over there in the trench coat:
http://www.eff.org/cgi/tiny?urlID=441
Ex-FCC Chairman Michael Powell Launches Pirate Radio
Station
"DJ Mic-Power" is using his newfound free time to
broadcast Post-Punk classics from a Chevy van parked
outside FCC headquarters:
http://www.eff.org/cgi/tiny?urlID=441
Doctorow Sends DMCA Takedown Notice to Parody Site
Hey - whatsa matter? Even we have our limits, you
know:
http://www.eff.org/cgi/tiny?urlID=439
(Importance Of...)
Siva Vaidhyanathan Fires Blog Co-Author Ann Bartow
Explains Siva, "I have asked Ann Bartow to refrain
from posting any more to Sivacracy.net. Basically,
she was detracting from the mission of this blog:
the pure and unadulterated promotion of me, Siva
Vaidhyanathan":
http://www.nyu.edu/classes/siva/archives/001005.html
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