Sorta funny...

forwarded from someplace. 



>Here is an interesting story a friend of mine sent me
>
>
>	       **If an O/S Ran Your Airline**
>
>
>DOS Airline:
>Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they
>jump on and let the plane coast until it hits the ground
>again, then they push again, jump on again and so on.
>
>DOS with QEMM Airline:
>The same thing - with more leg room to push.
>
>MAC Airline:
>All the stewards, stewardesses, captains, baggage handlers,
>and ticket agents look the same, act the same, and talk the
>same.  Every time you ask questions about details, you are
>told you don't need to know, don't want to know, and that
>everything will be done for you without you having to know,
>so just shut up.
>
>OS/2 Airline:
>To board the plane, you have your ticket stamped ten
>different times by standing in ten different lines.  Then
>you fill out a form showing where you want to sit and
>whether the plane should look and feel like an ocean liner,
>a passenger train, or a bus.  If you succeed in getting on
>board the plane and the plane succeeds in getting off the
>ground, you have a wonderful trip...
>except for the times when the rudder and flaps get frozen in
>position, in which case you have time to say your prayers
>and get in crash position.
>
>Windows Airline:
>The airport terminal is nice and colorful, with friendly
>stewards and stewardesses, easy access to the plane, and a
>completely uneventful takeoff...then, once in the air, the
>plane blows up without any warning whatsoever.
>
>Win NT Airline:
>Everyone marches out on the runway, says the password in
>unison, and forms the outline of an airplane.  Then they all
>sit down and make a whooshing sound like they're flying.
>
>Unix Airline:
>Everyone brings one piece of the plane with them when they
>come to the airport.  They all go out on the runway and put
>the plane together piece by piece, arguing constantly about
>what kind of plane they're building.
>
>Mach Airline:
>There is no airplane.  The passengers gather and shout for
>an airplane, then wait and wait and wait and wait.  A bunch
>of people come, each carrying one piece of the plane with
>them.  These people all go out on the runway and put the
>plane together piece by piece, arguing constantly about what
>kind of plane they're building.   The plane finally takes
>off, leaving the passengers on the ground waiting and
>waiting and waiting and waiting.  After the plane lands, the
>pilot telephones the passengers at the departing airport to
>inform them they have arrived.
>
>Newton Airline:
>After buying your tickets 18 months in advance, you finally
>get to board the plane.  Upon boarding the plane, you are
>asked for your name.  After 4-6 times, the crew member
>recognizes your name and you are then allowed to take your
>seat.  As you are getting ready to take your eat, the
>steward announces that you will have to repeat the boarding
>process because they are out of room and need to recount to
>make sure they can take more passengers.
>

The views expressed in this message are mine, not EFF's. 
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Dan Brown brown@eff.org  Sysadmin for The Electronic Frontier Foundation. 
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